Humans Will Always Be Humans

Heave Ho it's Mir here!


I've re-activated all my social medias after 4 to 5 days deactivated them. I felt peace on those past few days. Social medias indeed make us addicted-like-hella-weed towards them. And now after 24 hours of reactivating them, I've already becoming addicted. AGAIN. Maigod. It stressed me out. Not because of the addiction, but bcs of overly-thinking towards other issue. An issue which I should have not worry/think abt it at all. But nahh, bukan Mir lah kalau tak over thinking 😑

This evening, I'd been over thinking with all "WHAT IF" situations and scenarios. Sigh. And it affected my mood the whole evening, until now. But right now I've already calmed a little bit, which is why I can sit quietly and express everything here. Thank Godness. 

I hate this feeling. This kind of unsure, what if, questioning myself situations. I hate it. It's bcs I didnt seem to find the answers to all those questions and uncertainties. It's not that I'm being insecure, BIG NOOO. It's just that a feeling which I knew I would never get answers from certain people even if I'd go and ask them to get the real answers, I would still not be getting the answers. Oh yessss I do really hate that. 

Frankly speaking, I am tired. Already tired with all this things. But I couldnt seem to find the solution/way/whatever you called them in order to stop all these. Sometimes I did wander and ponder, is it related to the dream actually? What it has to do with all my dreams? My intuitions? My guts? Who am I dealing with actually? What did it has to do with my life?

You see, all these questions I couldnt find the answers. Even answered to these questions. Dead end. Teeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeettttttttttttttttttttttttttt. Double sigh. 

Whatever it is, I never stop praying. For the answers, for that one particular person to be granted with happiness and success. And many more. Never been tired. Not bcs of the feelings. No. But bcs of sincerity. I do really want that person to succeed in life. Even if I would already being expelled by that person in the future 😅

No worries, Mir is fine. Mir just need positive vibes, and she'll get back on her current track. Just wish Mir some luck, and some strength. I'll appreciate them. Really really do appreciate them :)

As usual, nobody would read this but if you're intended to leave any comments, please dont ever hesitate to do so. I'll read it gladly :) Gtg for now. Chiaoww!

Mir. 🎈

Bleh-bleh-bleh

Heave Ho it's Mir here!


You see, we tend to become emotional, especially when it related with our feelings. Whatever we bottled up, alone, we tend to feel hurted inside. Like nobody cares abt us. This is why, ME-TIME is very important.

I would say, me-time really helped me in calming myself down. It helps me to re-think whatever I'd done throughout the day. Or few days aback. Kita boleh duduk bertenang, fikir sejenak, apa yg dah pun kita buat, apa yg buat kita jadi murung and isolated ourselves from the world for a while. We could see all that whenever we reached peace.

I've mentioned in the previous post "jot down everything, and whenever you're ready, re-read all the jots". Indeed. Kita akan lebih nampak, lebih tahu macam mana emosi kita masa tu. Macam mana kita handle emosi kita PADA MASA ITU. Daripada situ, kita tahu macam mana our anger management. It really works on me. Bcs at the end of the day, I knew which part i"ve one wrong. And I knew which part I should alter/change/makeover whatever it is called. Tapiiii yes memang penat nak tulis semua. Nak taip dekat socmeds pulak, people are watching us. So it's a BIG NOOO! Jangan sesekali gunakan social media as a medium or platform to express our anger. It's very dangerous. Sesekali is okay, but please still kekalkan etique and adab while you're on the socmed okay! Behave ya!

Later than, I am sooo malas nak tulis apa semua, apatah lagi nak taip anything. I'd prefer for not to involve myself with socmeds whenever I was not in good mood. Kalau tak tahan sangat, okaylah I'll tweet something, but not being too precise with the words. Let other make their own assumptions. Which is why, one of the reason why I am deactivating my social media accounts for now. 

Okay, back to our business. Disebabkan Mir sangat malas dah nak menulis, therefore I tend to lie down/duduk sendirian sekejap dalam bilik. Tengok siling, tengok kipas. Tengok surrounding. Tak dalam bilik pun takpe, as long as you can detach yourself from others for a while. Jangan fokus dekat orang lain, sekejap. Fokus dekat diri sendiri dulu. Like Mir, I will look at the ceiling, termenung sendirian kejap. Tenangkan hati, tenangkan fikiran. Tenangkan gelora gelodak jiwa yg tengah membara. Yg peling penting, MULUT KENA DIAM. JANGAN BUNYI/MEMBEBEL/BISING/MENGUNGKIT whatever you called them. JANGAN. Semua yg Mir mention ni would make thing worse. And definitely we dont want that to happen. 

Pandang ceiling diam diam. Well, IT IS FACT that we will put the blame on others in order to calm ourselves down. Okay, buatlah dulu kalau itu yg boleh tenangkan hati. Lepastu, slowly try tanya diri sendiri "BETUL KE ITU SALAH DIA? HOW ABT IF THAT WAS MY FAULT TOO? WHAT IF IT IS MY FAULT FROM THE BEGINNING? I DID WRONG TOO" Yes guys we should do this. Sebab everything happen bukan salah org lain jugak. Sometimes it is bcs of ourselves. Tapi sebab orang lain nak jaga hati, jaga perasaan kita, then they tend to cheat. They have their own reasons for why they were doing that to us. 

Like my case, maybe Mir the one who did put too much hope. Maybe I'm the one who's being too afraid to let go of anything. Maybe I'm the one who's being too attached. Maybe it's my fault from the beginning. Finally, I got my answers. Yes, it was me. I was the one who should be put on blame. Not anyone else. Me. It is me. So now, I am in the middle of process to let go of everything, if that is the best for both sake. It is not easy weasy peasy, but still I need to learn to let go, aite? Got long journey to go, fellas 😊 

Dalam hidup ni, kita tak selalu betul. Kalau ada orang yg boleh tegur kita, then you guys should be grateful. You guys got someone who did really love you. Kalau takde, that is why kita kena belajar to always put the blame on us. So that we wont over exceed the limit. Tapi janganlah sentiasa salahkan diri sendiri, nanti orang menyampah. So, berpada okay. It's just a guidance for us for not being too excited in putting the blame on others. Orang pun ada hati, ada perasaan. It's a balance between reality, and empathy. Okay? 

"Good heart would lead to good result". Dengki dengki nak pergi mana? Pathetic loser.

I know nobody would read this HAHAHAHAHA but if you're reading this, and intended to leave any comments, please dont ever hesitate to do so. I'll read it gladly :) Gtg for now. Chiaoww!